Bippity-Boppity-Bacon

Raise your hand if you know who Jim Gaffigan is. Boom, all 37 of my readers hands just shot up.

Good. That means that you know Bippity-Boppity-Bacon is a reference to a bit that Jim does about adding bacon to a salad. He says something along the lines of it just turns into a treasure hunt for the bacon. Jim's comedy on food is epic to say the least. His book, Dad Is Fat, is worth a read. I laughed. I laughed out loud.

Rewind to Saturday night. I was cranky. Like I have not been cranky in awhile. I don't know where it came from, possibly a jet lag type syndrome from my first Hot Yoga, maybe I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, maybe I was beginning to realize my need for better time management. Who knows. Bottom line, I was a grump.

As a result, I was hungry. My physiologic response to basically everything. My survival instincts in that regard should guarantee me to make it through a zombie apocalypse or a nuclear winter with no problems whatsoever. I can store food and take a big nap. Live to fight another day.

I got a little off track right there. Saturday night. I had some friends ask me over for a beer. Knowing the mood I was in I knew I was not gonna be great company. Probably quiet and sullen, a buzz-kill if you will. So, I was faced with dilemma of dinner. I told my Mom that I would have dinner with her when she got off of work. I didn't know what I wanted so she said she would cook. After I hung up the phone from this conversation, I murmured under my breathe, anything but salad. I was at the point if I saw another salad I was going to throw a plate through a wall. My ever growing biceps and my Hulk-like rage would facilitate that feat quite easily. Salad = Giant Green Rage Monster.

I was in the middle of an online quiz for school when my Mom arrived. I heard her cooking away, but didn't really pay attention. She delivered to me one salad with some grilled shrimp on top. I smiled politely. Choked it down. I'm sure it was great, but in my mind it was ANOTHER effing (ear muffs) SALAD. I wanted to throw the gosh darn (no earmuffs) plate through the wall. But, I am all about being supportive of my Mom and her healthy choices right now. Hulk had to stay in his(her) cage.

I am still eating salads. I dress them up with cruciferous vegetables, nuts, berries, lean protein, avocados, grilled mushrooms, and so on and so forth. No Bippity-Boppity-Bacon. Salads are the easiest way for me to eat properly. Lots of veggies and lean protein are good, solid nutrition (notice I didn't say diet, nutrition). But I hit the end of my rut on Saturday night. Does that ever happen to you? You know you are making the right choice, the healthy choice, but it doesn't really make you feel all that much better about it or about you. Good news, it passed. Bad news, I'm sure it will happen again. I just have to remember it is like making deposits in a savings account. The funds I put in today will be paying next months dividends. This month's hard work will equal next month's healthier body. I just wish I could make that portion of my mind dumb. That way it wouldn't realize it was just eating a salad. It could think we were having a steak and cheesy potatoes every day, sometimes twice a day. Mmmmmmm. Steak. Mmmmmmm. Potatoes. Anyways, when and if that feeling rolls up on you, hold back that inner Hulk and keep it together. There are long run goals to be had that short term indulgences won't help. I'm not saying don't indulge every now and again, but make sure it is because you really want to, not because you need to placate a giant green rage monster.