I want to make sure that my posts are not just continual repeats of themselves. I don't want to bore the awesome crew that tunes in to read this blog. I love you guys and the last thing that I want to do is bore you. I also don't want to be preachy, but I know it happens sometimes. Good thing you know that I am human.
I've been a little quiet lately for a couple of reasons.
Two days ago my friend lost her battle with cancer. In all honesty, she lost the battle a couple weeks ago when the cancer started taking her voice and her strength from her. Things that she deserved to have all the way to the end. I am eternally sad for myself and all the others that she has left behind, but I am equally grateful that her suffering is over.
During the time when I wanted to be devoted to my friend the most, some news was delivered to my family that took me in other directions. My grandmother beat breast cancer in 2009. We have recently found out that it has returned. It has also possibly spread to her liver (there are a few more diagnostics to find this out). I have spent my fair share of time in hospital waiting rooms these days. In the next couple weeks she will have surgery to remove her entire right breast.
I have also not had any grand fitness or health revelations either. I am staying my course, results are slowly but surely coming. But I haven't had any grand tales to tell you.
These are the main reasons that I haven't been posting as regularly. I am not telling you these things because I am looking for an outpouring of sympathy. Although I know that all of you are cheering me on all the time, and I love you for it. I am happy, healthy, and thankful for every day that I can hit the pavement. I am telling you this because I want you to know how I am dealing with all of it. It is very important (to me) that I be available and able to help my loved ones. But, if I am not taking care of myself, I will not be of any help to them. While I would like nothing more than to curl up on a couch and feel sorry for myself, I'm not taking that option. Here's how I am dealing with it:
I am compartmentalizing things as well as I can. I am putting everything into its own little box and dealing with things one box at a time.
One of those boxes is labelled EXERCISE. It is more important to me now than it was two months ago. I need it not only for my body, but my mind. I hiked up my mountain on Sunday. It had been a little while since I had been up there. It was glorious. I got close to God and I talked to him about giving strength to the people in my life that need it most right now. I got to see the amazing view from up there and I felt immensely better when I got down.
Another box is labelled NUTRITION. I am not going to binge eat just because there are some emotional things happening in my life right now. What good will a fatter version of me be to the people in my life? No good at all, that's what. I feel great right now, my nutrition is in check and my body is getting leaner and meaner all the time. Emotional eating will only sabotage those two things.
Another box is labelled GRAM. I have every intentions of fighting this battle side-by-side with her. She doesn't always make the healthiest of choices, so maybe I can lead her by example. I know that I am going to have to be a strong rock for her to lean on during the coming months. I don't intend to fail her in that regard.
FAMILY/FRIENDS are another box. Some of them need me more than others, I am doing my best to be there for them when they do need me and am trying to be proactive in thinking of things they might need. Sometimes, they might just need a laugh. There are a lot of hugs going around these days too.
There are boxes for WORK and for SCHOOL and the best part about them is that they are all scheduled. No sucker punches or surprises there. I am done with school at the end of the first week of May... HOOOOORAY for summer!
Finally, there is a box labelled HAPPINESS. I am refusing to let any of the sad stuff that is going on in my life right now steal my happiness. I am working hard towards lots of goals in my life and to stay motivated I am going to have to do better than just treading water (emotionally speaking). I'm going to be the old cliche of a positive attitude = a positive life. If I'm happy, maybe, just maybe, I can rub off a little on those in my life that are having a hard time. Who knows if that will work or not, but I do know this for sure... Being negative isn't gonna get squat done for me or for them.
So, there you have it, please forgive me if I am a little sporadic in posting the next few weeks. I will do my best and by golly when I have something funny to say you are gonna hear about it!!
P.S. As wild (read as SHOCKING) as my new shoes are, they make me happy.
Drink your water.
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