I've Noticed A Few Things

Hey... I'm gonna give you another list. I like lists. They keep me from rambling. They are organized. Or at least they pretend to be. You can talk about them later with ease... "Hey did you see #8 of The Final Fifty list? That girl is crazy!" They are a good way to talk about several different things without having to seamlessly transition in between. It's cheating for writers. Rambling over, list beginning in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...

#1 I noticed as I was walking today (it wasn't a running day) that my elbows no longer hit my fat sides when I walk. They not only don't hit, but they don't even brush up against. Is it possible that I am getting a waist? You know, that space between arms and midsections in silhouettes of women. What the heck do I do with one of those? Wear a belt?? No way. But it's nice to have my elbows freed up.

#2 I realized today that I have not had any back pain in quite some time! Further proof that my back pain is entirely preventable by taking care of myself. No drugs, no adjustments, no other therapies. Just good old exercise and decent nutrition. Go figure.

#3 I am two days behind on my P90X3. I have a semi-good reason for this. Last Friday before I headed up to my best friend's for my honorary niece's birthday I was riding my two year old colt that I am just starting. He stumbled and then really tripped and then did an ass-over-tea-kettle somersault and then landed on his side on my leg. I have been a little bruised up and I seemed to hurt my shoulder/collarbone. All injuries are a long ways from my heart and I am going to be just fine. But, I took an extra couple days to try and let things settle back where they should go. I plan on catching up the two workouts this weekend. It's a weigh-in day on Sunday or Monday. Eeeek. So look for some numbers coming your way. In the mean time, enjoy my awesome bruises!! P.S. It looks a lot worse than it feels.

#4 I have been thinking about the word single a lot lately. I get saddled with that term quite often. Its most basic meaning is alone. And sometimes I feel alone. I have chosen relatively solitary jobs. I spend most of my evenings alone with my dogs (but they are awesome dogs). I work out alone. I am a social creature normally, but apparently I appreciate solitude. Most of the time I am the social event planner in my circle of friends. A role I love to take on! Lately when I have been on social outings I am there, but I feel a little withdrawn. I think that cancer in your life does that to you. But, really, if you think about it, any crisis in life can do that to you. Money problems? First thing you do is withdraw yourself and tell yourself you can't do anything because you don't have any money. Trouble on the home front? Time to retreat and spend more time at home and less time around other people. Put on some weight? Time to hideout and make sure no one gets the opportunity to see it until you get it off. The list goes on. Is this a survival instinct? Is this our way of protecting ourselves and our feelings? Is it an instinct that we should fight? I think so. I am going to work harder at being more present. I am not going to skip fun things because I don't deserve it or because there is cancer actively happening in my family. Why does one thing have to do with another? I have a girlfriend that invited me to her son's t-ball games and brought her boys over to see me the other night. Just to visit. She didn't need anything from me. In fact she was bringing me stuff for Gram to try for her nausea. She has no idea how bad I needed that visit. How bad I needed those t-ball games. She has seen cancer up close and personal. She knows how it can take over your life. Maybe she did know how bad I needed to just sit in the shade and chit chat. I am grateful to her for that. I think it brought me back to reality a little bit and convinced me to quit being such a hermit. I had another girlfriend come on a run with me. I almost killed her from heat stroke. But it was so very nice to have a partner to run with. I also visited my bestie last weekend. We shopped, we threw a party, we hiked. Seeing her and her family always helps. ALWAYS.

#5 Shaun T said something interesting today on his podcast. He said that the body you have is the one you deserve. He was speaking in the context that you shouldn't compare yourself to others. Remember that comparison is the thief of joy. He's right. I deserve everything that I think is right and everything that I think is wrong with my body. I have sweated, fought, and battled for the muscles and I have eaten my way to the fat. I have eared every ounce of both. I need to be more accepting of that so that I stay happy in my workouts and don't view them as a means to an end. There is no end to fitness, just continual progress.

#6 I don't think I like chia seeds. I have been trying to like them because they are a GREAT source of well-rounded plant protein. But, they freak me out. They start as seeds, and then somehow turn into weird little gel coated things in my mouth. They also like to reside between my teeth. They have literally no flavor, so all I have to go on is the texture. And, I don't like the texture.

#7 Tomorrow marks the start of concert season for me. Willie Nelson. Don't be a jealous hater. I'm taking Mom and Gram. It is going to be nice to take Gram to something besides chemo or grocery shopping. She will wave at Willie like he is singing to her. I know this because she does it at every concert I've ever taken her to. This time though, instead of being embarrassed, I am going to wave with her because he will be singing to her.

#8 It is going to top a hundred next week. I am secretly excited about this. I LOVE the heat.

#9 My new favorite dessert is a bowl of blueberries, blackberries, and raspberries with a drizzle of raw honey and a splash of almond milk. Sweet (the good kind), full of fiber, and oh-so-tasty! Give it a try. I know berries can be a little pricey but no more spendy than a a run to the store for a tub of ice cream can be. Speaking of, on my way home from Oregon over the weekend I stopped and had a mini Blizzard at Dairy Queen. I don't even feel bad about it. Jurassic smash-up was the flavor if you were curious.

#10 Refer to #8. It is getting hot out there. All the more reason to drink your water. Lots of it. Put some lemon in it. Put some mint in it. Put some cucumber in it. Whatever blows your skirt up besides the a/c vent.